Doubting Heart
by llAurorall
Summary: The penny finally drops. Myka and Helena are, and have always been, in love. It only took another brush with death to realise it.


Title: Doubting Heart

Author: Aurora

Pairing: Bering & Wells, Warehouse 13

Doubting Heart

Helena's head was throbbing and Myka's irate, panicked yelling was not helping to settle it. She grimaced as she touched her forehead. Her fingers came away tacky. Congealed blood stuck under her nails. The sight of it was enough to make her dizzy.

"Myka..."

Myka was oblivious to her. She raged against Steve who was too dumbfounded to respond. He looked like the deer in the headlights.

"Myka, I'm all right."

It was not Steve's fault. They had all followed the plan but as per usual, things had rapidly deviated. Helena's relatively safe position on the factory catwalks soon became the most dangerous. She was trapped by two assailants, preventing any escape. Neither was pleased over having their artefact confiscated.

Neither Myka nor Steve could get to her before she took a two by four to the head. Her legs buckled and she tumbled over the edge. She was prescient enough to grab the railings and nearly pulled her arm from the socket as she dangled at a height of over thirty feet.

Myka's shrill scream still echoed in her ears. Steve was the one to rescue her; bodily hauling her over the catwalk lip to lie in a breathless heap, life thundering in her ears once more.

"Myka, will you please calm down?"

Myka turned on her then, a vision of helpless fury. "Calm down," she sputtered angrily. "You want me to calm down when you were nearly-" her voice broke and Helena ached for her. "_Again_."

Wobbling and trying valiantly to hide it, Helena rose to her feet. Myka was there as she stumbled. Helena's insubstantial weight was taken effortlessly in the cradle of Myka's arms.

"I'm well," Helena said gently. "I'm here and I'm not hurt." She smiled ruefully, her head swimming with Myka's nearness more than her head injury. "Not too badly, at any rate."

"Don't," Myka begged. She gripped Helena's elbows to the point of pain. "Don't do that. Don't make this into another joke."

Helena returned the embrace. "You're not a joke to me, Myka."

"Then why do I always feel like the Universe is _laughing_ at us?" She moved away before Helena could stop her. Myka folded her arms and curled around herself. The sight of her, small and cowed, drove ice through Helena's heart. That she was the cause of such pain was unbearable.

Steve, blessed with a finely tuned emotional sensitivity, excused himself. Helena smiled her thanks. She waited a beat before approaching Myka again. She was enormously relieved when Myka did not rebuff her advance.

"I'm sorry," Myka mumbled. "I didn't mean to yell." She sighed. "It was unprofessional."

"I make it difficult for you. My presence."

Myka chuckled darkly. "You always have."

It was not what Helena expected to hear. But that was Myka; always throwing her for a spin. Always slipping beneath her guard and exposing her every vulnerability. And Myka was so unawares. Helena was left to stagger in her wake, bruised by so many conflicting signals.

"I'm sorry, Myka." She was close enough to whisper. It took all her strength not to reach out; not to hold on for dear life. The struggle showed in the tremble of her hand as it hovered inches from Myka's hip. "I always seem to be hurting you, don't I? No matter how I might try not to."

Myka turned. Her face was drawn. Hard. So much hurt on her face that Helena felt herself swaying again. Her eyes, usually soft when they turned Helena's way, burned.

"Haven't we suffered enough?" Myka's tone was accusatory. "Haven't we earned some sort of good karma by now?" Myka's hands were in her jacket, shaking Helena for emphasis. "How much more do we have to give?"

Helena blinked. "We?"

Myka let her go as if she was suddenly too hot to touch. Her face paled. A line of sweat broke out over her brow and Helena wondered which one of them was going to pass out first. Myka's fingers came up to her mouth, no doubt to try and take back what now sat between them.

"I thought... there was, and you, and-" Myka flushed scarlet. "I'm losing it."

Helena reached out, shaking even more, and tucked a stray curl behind Myka's ear. Her heart soared as Myka leaned into the touch, so obviously powerless to stop herself. Hope blossomed in her chest. If she could not respond to it now, she had no right to the feelings she harboured.

"I thought after we had dealt with Mr. Sykes and the astrolabe, there would be time. For us. I waited," she said softly. "I wanted nothing more than to admit my feelings to you. Only, after the danger passed, I began to wonder if I had completely misread you. I thought perhaps the connection we shared was simply borne of sheer desperation.

"I tried to resist," Helena said. "I tried so hard to honour the gift you gave me and never to ask for more. So I contented myself with being at your side, even if I longed for something else."

Myka looked incredulous. Bordering on furious. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. Helena had never seen the other woman look quite so dumbfounded. If the gravity of the situation had not already crushed the air from her lungs she might have devolved into hysterics.

"You mean I've been holding back, for nothing?" Myka jabbed Helena in the chest. "I have watched you take crazy risks and keep a distance, because of some skewed sense of honour? I thought you weren't interested any more. I thought... God, I thought I had imagined everything!"

"I only wanted you to be happy."

"And I only wanted _you_!" Myka threw up her hands. "You, Helena Wells, are an idiot. A brilliant, gorgeous, amazing, _stupid_, idiot."

Helena was developing whiplash. "I don't believe I have the pleasure of understanding what on earth is going on."

Now Myka was grinning and Helena knew there was something she had to catch up to and quick. She stepped back as Myka advanced on her. All at once she felt like prey and the look in Myka's eyes was doing nothing to dispel the idea. She barely managed a few steps before her back hit something. The air left her lungs in a quick burst and her heart beat double-time in her chest. The overall effect was one of exhilarating fear.

"You're an idiot," Myka repeated reverently. Her hands cupped Helena's face, thumbs brushing back and forth along her jaw. Her knees became watery. Her heart simply stopped. "But you're _my_ idiot."

Helena's eyes rolled back and a low groan fell from her lips.

Myka kissed her. Slow. Deep. Falling into Helena so there was no space left to keep them apart. Her hands came up to finger curly hair as Myka's tongue languidly slid against her own. Warmth pooled in her belly and raised all the hairs on her neck.

"Next time," Myka breathed, gaze heavy. Her pupils were blown and her lips were swollen. Helena was rapidly falling even further in love with this fey creature. "Try not to be so old-fashioned. Idiot."

"That's quite enough of that," Helena said. She pulled Myka back in for a bruising kiss. Myka's hands pressed against the planes of her stomach, flexing in concord with the slow brush of their hips. If not for the pointed coughing between one moan and the first touch of skin to skin, Helena was under no illusion about the high probability of them sinking to a puddle right there and then.

Steve was an impressive shade of puce when Helena managed to blink her eyes open. Myka looked similarly stupefied and her ego swelled considerably. Even after a century of abstinence, she could still dance.

"We really should snag and bag," Steve said. He scrubbed the back of his neck.

Myka ruffled her hair as if to shake the cobwebs out. It only served to make her look more amorously dishevelled. "Right. Artefact. Work." She looked at Helena. Her heavy gaze felt like a touch and Helena near whimpered as Myka tongued her lower lip. "Right."

The longing between them was palpable. Helena was absently aware of her body beginning to drift towards Myka, though she had no control over it. Steve threw up his hands and left. Helena was utterly immobilised. She thought she had struggled with her affections before. She did not know the meaning of the word back then. Not even Atlas could hold a candle to her in this moment of self-restraint; the weight of it was astronomical.

Steeling herself, Helena straightened herself out and made to follow Steve back into the bowels of the factory. Myka stopped her with a firm grip of her wrist.

"No more stupid risks," Myka said. "No more keeping your distance." Myka's voice became pleading. "Don't leave again."

Warmth spread through Helena in a rippling wave that reached even the darkest of shadows. She moved to interlace her fingers with Myka's.

"Oh, there's no getting rid of me now, Agent Bering."

Myka grinned like a giddy school girl. "Likewise, Agent Wells."

"Righty-ho, then." Helena tried for nonchalance even though she was the happiest she could ever recall being in this new life. She squeezed Myka's hand. "Let's go save the day, shall we?"

Myka tucked into Helena's side as they walked. The fit was easy and perfect and Helena finally felt as if she was coming home. If the small sigh of Myka's was anything to go by, she was not alone in that.

_Aurora_


End file.
